Why Are You Attracting Toxic People?

I recently had someone reach out who was questioning why they seemed to constantly get involved with toxic people.

They commented that they always seemed to be around these types of people, even though they will cause this person a lot of anxiety. 

This is more common that you may think and so, I want to make this simple with my four reasons why you do this. 

With these four reasons, you should come to an understanding as to why you find yourself around toxic people, and how to stop attracting them.

Who are you?

This is the first – not so simple- question that you need to ask yourself. You need to understand why you find yourself in these negative situations by looking inward.

How do you act around others? And also where do you find yourself in your friendship groups? For instance, are you the person usually following suit and doing what you’re told? 

If this is the case then what do you really think of this and are you comfortable with what you are doing and how you are acting.

Seeking validation

In other words, do you know how to make yourself happy or do you always have to seek out others’ approval.

Constantly seeking other people’s approval can come from many avenues. This could be from your childhood, where you were always expected to act a certain way in front of your friends at school and different in front of your parents. 

And when you act this way it will usually attract people who will want to take advantage of this to its full extent.

You’re following another person’s path

When you’re unsure about who you are and what you want from life, you’re going to look to others’ decisions and embrace them as your own.

This is a very difficult situation to be in as it can be hard to find what will genuinely make you happy without seeking an answer from a third party.


Fear can be a huge hurdle to embracing your true self. You might be scared of your full potential or anxious about failure.

Anxiety send a very strong signal to people who may have a toxic influence and it can be seen as a weakness.

Question however, what you are scared of and if you haven’t even tried to find out who you are, then how can you be afraid of what you haven’t even tried. There is no harm in it and faliiure is simply the next step towards success.

So, embrace the fear to find who you truly are and with that, any toxic person will no longer see you as an easy target.

Therapy in London

You may also like

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *