‘Why do I feel stuck?’ Steps to help you to move on with your life

How often do you feel stuck in your life? You feel you are doing the same things every day, not moving forward.

Maybe you are at the same job you have been at for years and bored with doing the same task every day, seeing the same people and not feeling fulfilled, respected or challenged with the job at hand.

You want new experiences, to see new things, meet new people and be happy but something is holding you back.

Feeling stuck is something that many people need help with.
I am told that they feel stuck or bored with their job, their hobbies or friends and that they want a change.

First of all, let’s address why you find it hard to change. Fear plays a big part.
It’s so easy and comfortable to do what you have always done, the same job, hang out with the same friends or remain in the same relationship. To break away from that monotony would mean a drastic change; a whole new way of relating to others and yourself.

Even thinking it right now probably makes you feel daunted and scared. Maybe you are asking yourself ‘Am I up to the task? Can I do it?’

A part of you likes being bored as it is safe, you know how to do the task, it’s not taxing and it’s easy. You know how people will react and that monotony is comfortable.

It’s just like a habit that you want to break. You don’t want to do it anymore but the thought of not having it in your life seems scary.

You not changing is a safety behaviour. This behaviour is relieving you from feeling tense and out of control in a new situation. The consequence of that safety, however, is a feeling of boredom, angst and feeling stifled.

So how do you start to break free from that safety behaviour?

Step one is to know what you want.

This might sound silly and like you know what you want already, but sit and think about it – do you really?

You might want to be rich, you might want to travel more, you might want to meet someone.

Let’s take being rich as an example.

How are you going to get rich? What job would you have? And how are you going to get that job? Not knowing the answers is OK but not knowing can make you feel scared to try.

Firstly, You need to have a plan of what you want and how you are going to get to your end point.

Set realistic goals. It’s not enough to just know what you want and have a plan of how you are going to get there. You need to schedule time and set yourself goals for those tasks.

You might be tempted to try and get everything done asap but you won’t get anything done unless you make it achievable. If you become too overwhelmed you will feel tired, stressed, bored and never stick at it so make sure that you set time for breaks as well.

Start Right NOW! The next step is to go out and do it.

The sort of change you want is not going to happen overnight, but by making a change no matter how small is going to have a dramatic impact on your life. It will show you that you have what it takes.

These small steps add up and the more you do the more you will feel able to manage, and soon enough you will actually want to do the work to get closer to your dreams. It won’t seem as daunting.

Enjoy yourself and enjoy the ride.
I am sure you would rather be doing anything but working, but if you made it this far, it must be something that you really want to do.

Make sure you are enjoying doing the stuff you need to do to reach your dreams otherwise, you will never stick with it.

What these tasks are doing is confronting that fear and transforming feelings of fear to excitement. Rather than taking on everything all at once you are taking small steps to make it manageable.

Remember these steps can be used for anything that you want to change in your life.

Start on your journey right NOW!

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